10 Things I Hate About Quake

10 Things I Hate About Quake (The Most Obscure List)

On December 2, 1999, a game that would revolutionize online gaming forever was born. Unfortunately, there were a few factors that kept this game from being truly great...

1. No orange color? What the fuck? Honestly! ID can make red, green, yellow, blue, light blue, purple, white, black, another red, and another black...but no orange? Two shades of blue...like a player really needs that much pressure on their shoulders to decide between them. With orange there would've been so many cool combinations! For example, white/black/orange.

2. Noobs. Every game has them, we all know that, and they're annoying as hell. But we can learn from them as well. We can learn about how we used to play this game. We can learn to respect the fact that they might not be as coordinated as us. We can learn to totally rape them and laugh at them. We can learn to make them diconnect after we do an awesome rail-jump or two and shoot them while we're strafing while demoing ourselves to make it into our new avatar or siggy. We can learn a lot.

3. iTDM. Instant Team Deathmatch. What's so instant about it? The game lasts 15 fucking minutes!

4. 1v1's are up here as well. For some reason players find it appealing to try and beat someone in a campfest match that, when they win, will say "Oh yea! Oh yea! I pwned your ass!"...Congratulations! you beat someone on the other side of the nation in a game that's been around for 10 years while they were running around looking for your camping ass. Oh, you beat me? Awesome. I'm going to make love to my girlfriend and go out to dinner while you practice your accuracy in Dallas. See you tomorrow ;D

5. Teammates. Some are smart, but for those who aren't, this little number is dedicated to you. Why the FUCK do you spam my teamchat saying "MELT HERE" every 2 seconds? We, as "professional" quakers, are used to the overwhelming fact that everyone has TeamOverlay. So there's no need to tell me where you are! I die from someone shooting me in the back because you were having fun saying "rofl" over and over after you got shot. I despise you...

6. Noghost. Why is it called Noghost? It's pronounced No Ghost right? Does this mean ghosts aren't allowed to play quake? What if God let's some angels have a day off and they want to play only to find out they can't because they're not human? One day the ghosts are going to rebel and make a NoHuman mod that will have all the best configs and gametypes and we won't be able to play because we just had to be isolated from them. Way to go guys.

7. Clans. There's too many to count, and too many people in them. Plus the tag designs are hideous. From a fashion point-of-view, they would get burned in a wood-fired stove before you could say "My tags are l33t!" Also, why do clans claim they are "original"? Clans have been around forever, even since medieval times. If anything, you're no better than the guy who wrote Twilight.

8. Tag/Name-stealers. Why do they really think it's fun to take someone's name? It's not fun, it's annoying. I have to track down your IP, ban you from everywhere only the have you reset your modem, and I have to tell everyone that that's not really me. You know what name-stealing is? It's identity theft. I should sue you.

9. Pigskin. That's not a map! That's a cheap imitation of what we would all love to be paid $20 million to play on. There aren't even any cheerleaders. Very disappointing.

10. Slash. Her gesture is one of the most amazing sounds ever heard from a woman. Admit it guys, if we found a woman with those kind of moaning abilities she would be a keeper. But Slash purposely has that gesture knowing full well that we will never be able to touch her...What a tease.


Hopefully now you understand the seriousness about this game and the issues it has.

i was just saying that earlier today, no orange eh?

<- Uses Slash Model :O

=]

i want brown and purple too...NOT PINK....PURPLE!!!$#%$#%

k bye..and about the "noobs" one, everyone has to start somewhere..u were a noob at one point xD

I thought a girl wrote twilight?? :p

where did twilight come from?

havn't u alredy posted this somewer else awhile ago tool

yea, from WsK. But noob deleted my account. So I decided to re-write it :>

YeTi wrote:

u were a noob at one point xD

you're still a noob at this point

and u STILL ask me to scrim....

YeTi wrote:

and u STILL ask me to scrim....

and you always say no... lol

false...just every time u scrim..i dont want to. >: D

gfg

kids in game its fucked up :E

Silas wrote:

kids in game its fucked up :E

yeti got pwned